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Coconuts are delightful and healthy orbs of magic that Mother Nature blessed us with, with the full intention that we eat co co sex, or mix with rum and pineapple for a refreshing tropical beverage.

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What Mother Nature did not intend, however, was co co sex horny dudes to drill holes in coconuts, and then proceed to fuck. No, no.

One day I hear that my mother is going to be out for pretty much the entire afternoon. Horny me decides that it would be a fantastic idea to fuck a coconut. Honestly to this day I can't fathom why I thought that would be a good co co sex but my train of thought back then was clearly somewhat clogged.

I end up grabbing the coconut drill and through 20ish minutes co co sex concerted effort end up creating a hole large enough for me to stick my porker. homely girls sex

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I decide co co sex vo some lube and grab the nearest slippery thing some butter before shoving it into the coconut followed shortly by my meat. I fuck the coconut and it actually feels pretty damn good so I blow my load, shove the coconut under my bed and continue about my day.

For the next week the coconut is my saviour. Whenever I want to get off I simply take it out and fuck it in its delightfully tight hole made better co co sex time by accumulating volumes of my semen and butter acting as a lubricant.

It's heaven. Oh my God.

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This is awful already, because 1 He's fucking a coconut. That sheer fact is already bad. About a week and a bit after the initial coconut fuck I had been using it pretty much every co co sex since then I begin co co sex notice a few more flies than usual as well as an odd, unpleasant smell about my room.

Must be the coconut right?

So I decide that I'll fuck it once more before I throw it out and get a new one. You see, the reason for the increased number of flies was that the coconut was evidently, co co sex hindsight, a nearly perfect place to lay eggs.

As I penetrate co co sex coconut one last time I begin to feel a strange wriggling sensation. They were wriggling all over my dick head and some were even trying to force their way up into my urethra. I guess that's Mother Nature's way of saying "Stop having sex with my coconuts!!! I guess nobody thought about the possibility that maybe, just maybehaving sex with a coconut is a poor idea. Turns out, I'm allergic to coconut water, and my co co sex swelled up and block the hole.

I panicked and ripped my cock out, which cut it horribly.

So here's the lesson: But having an allergic reaction isn't the worst thing that could happen when you're fucking women and men Beeville xxx coconut And yet another dude who wanted to try coco-nutting says he went to Trader Joe's to buy a coconut, but somehow confused a pineapple co co sex a coconut, and fucked the pineapple co co sex.

Nice one, buddy. There are just so many stories about coco-nutting gone wrong on the subredditthat you should definitely sift through and read them if you want a good laugh.

There are stories about people screwing watermelons. You know what this co co sex trend reminds me of? You know, when you cut a hole in a grapefruit and slip it over your ding-a-ling? Yeah, maybe having sex with fruits is a bad idea in general.

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Maybe we should just stick to having sex with humans. Not agriculture.

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